So That Happened...

You'll Never Hear That Theme Song The Same Way Again

So! According to this article, composer John Williams thinks of lyrics before writing any music. Being that the latest Indiana Jones moving is coming out next week (which, EEEE!), please enjoy the heretofore unknown lyrics to the theme song of Raiders of the Lost Ark:

In-di-ana fucking Jones

In-di-ana motherfucking Jones

In-di-ana fucking Jones

Bite my ballsack you Nazis I'm Indiana fucking Jones

You're totally singing it RIGHT NOW, aren't you? I KNOW YOU ARE. Why? Because I AM TOO.

Happy Mother's Day

And now, one of my all-time favorite movie scenes:

I cry every time I see this.  Every.  Single.  Time.

Some People Shouldn't Be Parents

And now, a conversation I had over the weekend:

Me (at work): Hello?

Woman: Hi. I want you to do a story on Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

Me: What kind of story? We're not affiliated with the studio, and I don't have any contact inf-

Woman (annoyed): I'm not ASKING for contact information! I want you to do a story on how Forgetting Sarah Marshall should be rated X instead of R! It's promoted for kids but it should be rated X!

Me (knowing what she is going to say but wanting to hear it anyway): Well, why do you think it should be rated X?

Woman (loudly): BECAUSE I took my kids to see this movie [emphasis mine] and in it you see a full naked male penis at least SIX TIMES! I don't know how I'm going to get that image out of my kids' heads!

Me (calmly): But, ma'am, the movie is rated R. It's not being promoted to children. It's for adults. What are your children doing seeing a rated-R movie?

Woman (even more shouty): I NEED YOU TO DO A STORY ON THIS! IT SHOULD BE RATED X! I'm trying to SAVE THE COUNTRY!!

Me (trying not to laugh): Ma'am, it's rated R. It's not FOR KIDS.

Woman (huffily): Oh, you're for it, you're for it. She's for it (directed to someone in the room).

Me: CLICK! (hangs up)

Thank You, Closed Captioning

As seen while on the treadmill and watching Dawn of the Dead on the USA Network this morning:

undead gnashing of teeth

cadaverous screaming

And my personal favorite:

flaming pile of screaming zombies

Awesome.

Leapin' Lizards!

It's Leap Day, everyone! I...guess you're supposed to do something big, right? Take the big "leap" as it were, at least according to various features I've seen on my TV?

I don't know what you're going to do today, but I'm using this as an excuse to post the following photo from one of my favorite movie musicals EVER that just happens to be directed by John Huston. Yes, THAT John Huston:

And this post would really be incomplete without a shot of this:

Albert Finney as Daddy Warbucks? Yes, please!

For Your Consideration: An Oscars Haiku

J'adore Ratatouille!
I ask you, whither Renfro?
Tilda Swinton? WOW.

Disclaimer #1: This is not to say that I do not love Tilda Swinton. I do. I love her whole androgynous look as well as her acting ability. I'm thrilled that she won! I just didn't expect it.

Disclaimer #2: Yes, I changed the haiku after posting it to make sure I mentioned the lack of Brad Renfro in the Dead People Montage, but be sure of this - I still want Daniel Day-Lewis to call me. Seriously.

"I triple-dog dare you!!"

Please to read my favorite news story: two boys get their tongues stuck to a pole a la Flick in A Christmas Story. I love this story SO much.

In related news, I kind of want need this leg lamp stocking for Christmas this year.

Aw.

RIP Heath Ledger.

Sigh.

My Two-Word Review Of Sweeney Todd

BLOODY BRILLIANT!

(Yeah, I went there. What of it?)

EEEEE!

I'll make this brief: I am going to a screening of Sweeney Todd tonight! YAY! I am SO excited about this, I can't tell you.

WOOOO!!!