So That Happened

NO, IT IS NOT

Overheard in Target a few weeks ago:

Grandmother to her grandchildren: It's okay to mix black and brown.   If you have a brown belt, it's okay to wear black shoes, or vice versa.

I had to restrain myself from swooping into their conversation like a fashion-conscious bat out of hell.

If I Was Really Anti-Social, I Wouldn't Be There to Begin With

A conversation that took place this week at the local LYS:

Woman: Why are you so anti-social?

Me (looking up from my knitting and mentally picking my jaw up off the floor): Excuse me?

Woman: Why are you so anti-social?

Me (wondering if my expression clearly shows how taken aback I am by her inquiry): I'm not. I'm just a quiet person.

Woman (trying to laugh it off): Oh, I'm just giving you a hard time.

Me (to myself): YEAH RIGHT.

I will say that I can be a little subdued whenever I am in a large group (I'm much better when dealing with people in a one-on-one or small group situation), so this woman is not entirely wrong. I admit to being quieter than normal when I go to the LYS because I like listening to all the conversations taking place while doing my own thing in the corner. HOWEVER, why one would even ask that question of someone else is beyond me. I mean, really.

Some People Shouldn't Be Parents

And now, a conversation I had over the weekend:

Me (at work): Hello?

Woman: Hi. I want you to do a story on Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

Me: What kind of story? We're not affiliated with the studio, and I don't have any contact inf-

Woman (annoyed): I'm not ASKING for contact information! I want you to do a story on how Forgetting Sarah Marshall should be rated X instead of R! It's promoted for kids but it should be rated X!

Me (knowing what she is going to say but wanting to hear it anyway): Well, why do you think it should be rated X?

Woman (loudly): BECAUSE I took my kids to see this movie [emphasis mine] and in it you see a full naked male penis at least SIX TIMES! I don't know how I'm going to get that image out of my kids' heads!

Me (calmly): But, ma'am, the movie is rated R. It's not being promoted to children. It's for adults. What are your children doing seeing a rated-R movie?

Woman (even more shouty): I NEED YOU TO DO A STORY ON THIS! IT SHOULD BE RATED X! I'm trying to SAVE THE COUNTRY!!

Me (trying not to laugh): Ma'am, it's rated R. It's not FOR KIDS.

Woman (huffily): Oh, you're for it, you're for it. She's for it (directed to someone in the room).

Me: CLICK! (hangs up)

Over the Hump

Look! My Simple Knitted Bodice is starting to look like an actual sweater!

It looks good, no? I'm really very happy with it. It fits snugly where I want it to fit, and has enough give where give is needed. Now my goal is to finish the sleeves before the end of the week so that I can say I finished the sweater in a month! I'll put up more info on my modifications once it's all said and done.

I just had a thought: my mom would be so mortified if she 1) knew about this blog, 2) saw that I put up a picture of myself in a streaky mirror, and 3) put up a picture of myself in my Christmas snowglobe pajama pants. Sigh.

My Current Favorite Commercial

Meat Loaf + '80s pop star Tiffany +  Adam Cagley as their son + the dove! = COMEDY GOLD.  Thank you, AT&T GoPhone!

Note: this is the long version (!) of the commercial, which I found here.

My Party Photo Post

Teresa had a birthday party last week!

There was birthday cake to be had:

Mmm. This goodness was from Vanilla Bake Shop in Santa Monica.

And good friends to share it with:

Peigi, Johnnie and Kate.

Kate, Teresa and Jen.

Jenny, Heidi, Vanessa and Johnnie.

And one bewigged flapper!

Happy birthday, Teresa!

YAY!

They're here! They're here! Our George Michael tickets are here!

I'm SO EXCITED!

Progress

I haven't written anything about knitting for some time (and I know I haven't finished my travelogue - I'll get on that, I swear), but I have been working on projects. Truly. Here's proof:

I am over halfway done with the Simple Knitted Bodice from Stitch Diva Studios. It is for me - ME! Mwahahaha. I have finished the Chevron Lace detail and Purl Ridges, and am about to start the hip shaping. I just need to try it on to see how it fits.

When this sweater is done I'll write a longer post in which I'll tell you all about the frogging, the re-frogging, and Clifford the Big Red Yarn Football.

Thank You, Closed Captioning

As seen while on the treadmill and watching Dawn of the Dead on the USA Network this morning:

undead gnashing of teeth

cadaverous screaming

And my personal favorite:

flaming pile of screaming zombies

Awesome.

Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction

This is my favorite creepy story of the week:

Suicide Links Heart Donor, Recipient

Really, people, you can't write better stuff than this.